I woke up again this Sunday morning a little unaware of what time it was and with a slight hangover.
The plans for last night was to have a nice chilled film night, enjoying my own company since The Boy was out for the evening. So what did I decide to do? Have a Gin and Tonic, call my Dad and end up in the local pub. Four hours later I crawled in to bed.
Since I got struck with a vomiting virus last weekend the plan was to have a detox until Christmas. The detox for me must have lasted about 2 nights at least and then I was back to my usual habits of having at least a glass of wine in the bath/in front of the TV during the evenings. I even had a little bit of Irish Cream in my coffee yesterday afternoon, just for the sake of it.
A little won’t hurt, but what happens when you add all the little bits up? This has got me wondering if I have a slight problem in the drinking department. I just can’t seem to resist, if someone offers I can’t seem to say no, if there’s wine in the fridge I will make sure it’s attended to, if there isn’t any I will have a trip down to the hop to stock up ( even if it is a Wednesday evening). I know I shouldn’t be drinking on the medication I’m on, but I still do it. Clearly that can’t do any good when my main goal for the rest of this year is to finally stabilise my mood and eradicate my anxiety issues after a very rocky and unpredictable year.
The topic in question has also got me thinking if there’s a slight probability of a genetic predisposition to a favourable attitude towards alcohol in our family. My Dad, who I love dearly, has an undeniable drinking problem (I’m still very ignorant to the term ‘alcoholic’, even though it’s becoming increasingly evident that this may just be the case). For him, after a few in the local after work it’s back home to tuck in to the nightly bottle of red or two. It’s been the same way for ten years, and his reason behind it is due to his insomnia (however, this is more what’s causing his sleeping difficulties). No matter how much he overindulges, he still manages to keep a relatively clean bill of health though for him I believe he is fully aware that this is only a matter of time.
So why do I drink? the only reasons I can think of is down to habit, and stress. A glass of wine in the evening has been, and has been for a while, my number one way of winding down in the evening after a long day being a mother. I think it’s about time I dropped the ‘no harm done’ attitude and changed these unhealthy habits, however hard that may be. Skip the nightly tipple and save the drinking for nights out.
Let’s see how this one goes over Christmas, I think I might just need a little motivation in the healthier direction.