Realisation.

I had an interesting night to say the least tonight.

I had a friend over for a few (controlled!) drinks, just a catch up. Taking quite an open approach to the disorder, she’d recently learnt about my diagnosis and wasn’t afraid to ask a few questions. We talked about the way I used to be throughout high school when she just started to know me. We talked about my fragmented childhood and how hard it was growing up with mental illness in the family.

The thing that really shocked me was the approach she took towards the subject. Instead of being discustedly suprised by the self injury, the drug addiction, the other episodes I’ve had she just giggled away and either said “Yes I know” or ” That doesn’t surprise me”.

It was refreshing.

She had admitted that she’s been discussing me and the way I am with another close friend quite recently and that they were reminiscing about the school days. How I had my jesus phase, also known as my religious delusions, my anger outbursts, and my zest for life. It was really strange getting an outsiders perspective rather than me being the one thinking back to it all. Back then I didn’t know how different I was. So I didn’t just have one religious phase then, as it turns out I had more than that!

A lighthearted approach to something to extereme and a topic that is taboo to others and she sat there and said to me this;

“We wouldn’t have you any other way Megan. It’s the way you are and we love you for it.”

And then all of a sudden the acceptance I’d been striving for myself, happened.

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