F**k you and f**k it all.

I’m exhausted. I’ll make this’s quickie.

So it turns out I have well and truly crashed. I’ve been napping during the day, in bed 8pm every night this week and my mood has sank.

Today I woke up at, get this; TWO fifteen PM. Slept through the phone calls, the alarms, slept through my plans. I’ve been shattered, and in such a teary daze all day.

This is when I start feelin the most hatred towards the way I am. I’ll have to hold my mood up for this week, I’ve been doing so well. Time to use the positive coping methods I’ve been teaching myself all week to pull through it.

I can pin point it back to the Tramadol relapse. That’s the only thing I can think of what has set my crash off. It’s not fair. Why am I the one who has to suffer, when it was just getting so good for me? No rest for the wicked.

So tonight I fucked the world off, drank a glad of wine and took some more painkillers. If sleep is why my body needs, I’ll give it sleep. I just want this to be over now.

I’m so tired.

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